States Of Innocence- connections with music

Journeys- specially road journeys have for the most part, for me been associated with music. From R.D.Burman, Kishore Kumar and Asha Bhonsle to Abba, Carpenters, Boney M, Men at Work, Sting, Dire Straits,Madonna and Michael Jackson- pop n rock to serenades and odes of supreme longing- the feeling is best felt on a long drive.

Speaking from personal experience drives are also  time of switching off from ones anxiety driven current existence and switching into a kind of relaxed’ time -out’ where there’s precious little else to do but chill and unwind, unless ,ofcourse you are sleeping through it.

The Delhi-Dehradun drive is one particular ride  I have grown up with— through my childhood years in boarding school  where the longing for home and excitement of journeying with friends were the preoccupations even as one sang ‘careless whispers’ , ‘ wake-me-up before you go-go’, or ‘Like a virgin’. Looking back , I marvel at the way I still remember all the lyrics of the songs of that bygone era, but I may not recall the details of a conversation last week. Everyone knew the lyrics and sang them without any judgement about what they were singing.  Looking back from a present day  helicopter parenting perspective, our caregivers were quite nonchalant about ‘what happens to the values of kids who listen to such lyrics?’

At a recent boarding school batch reunion, one of the girls who I have not been in touch with called me aside and thanked me for something she said made a significant difference to her. When I looked confused she said, she did not know the words of 3 Madonna songs and I had helped by writing them down for her in her diary which she has still kept. While something like this may seem trivial in the digital age of instant access, but at a time where you were defined by the ‘cool stuff you knew’ this small act created a forever bond.

The biggest music crush of my life was Morten Harket, the lead singer of  band called A-ha. Striking Norweigan features and the voice of Cupid, he inspired me to the extent that I used ‘Harket’ as my surname pretty publicly for one whole year from the age of 13-14. The Lyrics of ‘Touch me – How can it be? Believe me – The sun always shines on TV’ for an entire generation growing up in the mid-80s in India which was suddenly being exposed to television .

Names like Michael Jackson, Boy George , U2 and Prince were synonymous with teenage rebellion. Of course the trend was set by Pink Flyod’s iconic’ We don’t need no education’—- where schooling was seen as ‘ just another brick in the wall.’ We were a generation that quietly went about following parental dictats— happily reconciled to our fate as long as we could acknowledge that we were being stifled by the system. This compromise seemed to suit everyone.

Throughout my young adulthood, my musical taste did not really evolve, because any leisure time or long drives meant a compulsive reaching for the comfort zone of the old and familiar crooners.

Cut to the time when my first born was about 10 years old and I started hearing about people like Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez and Ariana Grande….soon long rides meant the family was listening to ‘ The Hear Wants what it Wants’ or ‘I can make the Stars dance’ and ‘love you like a love song.’

By the time my younger one reached the same age, we were in a double lane alternating between all the Ranbir Kapoor and Ranvir Singh hits- right from ‘Balam pichkaari’ to ‘Ae Dil Hai Mushkil’ to ‘ Malhari, on one side and the rather sad ‘I built a friend’ by Alec Benjamin about a boy- self made robot relationship- a rather poignant commentary on life in the digital age. Then there was a rather ominous sounding ‘ Blood on the water’ by Grandson.

Music, no matter the person, time or place has the ability to speak a universal language that cuts across barriers and unites listeners in a harmonious space of peace and relaxation.

While I often wonder at the gaps in my understanding of the next generation , or my ability to relate, listening to their choice of music is often an effective way to reconnect at a deeper level, and no words are necessary.